Text of Londons Ordinarie

I have set out below the text of the ballad in full. For analysis of the origin, and the role of alehouses, inns and ordinaries see this link. See also the earlier version by Thomas Heywood.

Londons Ordinarie,or Every Man in his humour

To a pleasant new tune

Through the Royall Exchange as I walked,

where Gallants in Sattin did shine:

At midst of the day, they parted away

at severall places to dine.

The Gentry went to the Kings head,

the Nobles into the Crowne:

The Knights went to the golden Fleece,

and the Plow-man to the Clowne.

The Cleargie will dine at the Miter,

the Vitners at three Tunnes:

The Usurers to the Devill will goe,

and the Fryers unto the Nunnes.

The Ladyes will dine at the Feathers,

the Globe no Captaine will scorne:

The Huntsmant will goe to the Greyhound below,

and some Townesmen to the Horne.

The Plummer will dine at the Fountaine,

the Cookes at the holy Lambe:

The Drunkards at noone, to the Man in the Moone,

and the Cuckolds to the Ramme.

The Rorers will dine at the Lyon,

the Watermen at the old Swan:

And Bawdes will to the Negro goe,

and Whores to the naked Man.

The Keepers will to the white Hart,

the Mariners unto the Ship:

The Beggers they must take their way,

to the Egshell and the Whip.

The Farriers will to the Horse,

the Blackesmiths unto the Locke:

The Butchers unto the Bull will goe,

and the Carmen to Bridewell Docke.

The Fishmongers unto the Dolphin,

the Bakers to the Cheat Loafe:

The Turners unto the Ladle will goe,

where they may merrily quaffe.

The Taylors will dine at the Sheeres,

the Shoomakers wiil to the Boote:

The Welshmen they will take their way

and dine at the signa of the Goat.

The second part, to the same tune.

The Hosiers will dine at the Leg,

the Drapers at the signe of the Brush:

The Fletchers to Robin-hood will goe,

and the Spend-thrift to Beggers Bush.

The Pewterers to the quart Pot,

the Coopers dine at the Hoope:

The Coblers to the Last will goe,

and the Barge-men to the Scoope.

The Carpenters will dine to the Axe,

the Colliers will dine at the Sacke,

Your Fruterer hee to the Cherry Tree,

good fellowes no liquor will lacke.

The Gold-smiths to the three Cups,

for money they hold it as drosse:

Your Puritan to the Pewter Can,

and your Papists to the Crosse.

The Weavers will dine at the Shuttle,

the Glovers will unto the Glove:

The Maydens all to the Mayden-head,

and true Lovers unto the Dove.

The Saddlers will dine at the Saddle,

the Painters will to the greene Dragon:

The Dutchman wil goe to the signe of the Froe,

where each man madryinke his Flagon.

The Chandlers will dine at the Scales,

the Salters at the signe of the Bag:

The Porters take paine at the Labour in vaine,

and the Horse-courier to the white Nag.

Thus every man in his humour,

form North unto the South:

But he that hath money in his purse,

may dine at the signe of the Mouth.

The Swaggerers will dine at the Fencers,

but those that have lost their wits:

With Bedlam Tom, let there be their home,

and the Drum the Drummers best fits.

The Cheter will dine at the Checquer,

the Pick-pokets in a blind Ale-house:

Till taken and tride up Holborne they ride,

and make their ends at the Gallowse.

Posted: April 7th, 2011 | Filed under: Writers | Tags: Literary, Londons Ordinary, Thomas Heywood, pubs | No Comments »